Books have been a lifeline for me as a relatively new parent. I’m incredibly lucky (or unlucky, depending on your perspective) to be raising kids in the age of the internet: I have a question, tippity tap tap, and voila! I have several answers of varying quality and/or accuracy. What counts as a fever in a baby? Answered. How do you begin weaning? Answered. When do toddlers start sleeping through the night regularly? Answered (but apparently my kids didn’t read the same articles about this as I did).
But books offer me something else, because (based on my very limited experience) I don’t think the most important part of being a parent is so much what you do, but how you do it. And that’s the really hard part. In her book Raising Good Humans (which I’ve only just started so it didn’t make the list below), Hunter Clarke-Fields writes “Want some major personal growth? Six months with a preschooler can be more effective than years alone on a mountaintop.” Cheers to that. What I appreciate about all the books below is they have changed my perspective of my kids and/or myself in some way.
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No Bad Kids by Janet Lansbury
This book (and Janet’s podcast, Unruffled) radically changed my perspective of little kids for the better. While I don’t follow all her advice (I think reading parenting books is a lot like reading personal growth books—cherry pick the stuff that resonates and leave what doesn’t!), she has had a huge influence on the way I view my children and I often hear her voice in my head when I’m thinking through a parenting challenge.
The Power of Showing Up by Daniel J. Siegel and Tina Payne Bryson
Daniel J. Siegel books appear twice on this list because they are a helpful blend of science, personal experience, and actionable advice (I’ve also heard excellent things about The Whole Brain Child, which is on my ‘to read’ list). The Power of Showing Up is no exception: it takes a big, nebulous topic like “showing up for your kids” and breaks it down into four easy-to-understand categories: making them feel safe, seen, soothed, and secure. It has a lot of useful information about attachment and is one I think I’ll get more out of each time I read it.
Motherhood: Facing and Finding Yourself by Lisa Marchiano
Unlike the other books on this list, this isn’t a book about interacting with kids, but it is a book about parenthood, specifically the experience of becoming a mother. Lisa is a Jungian analyst who explores the hero’s journey of motherhood through myths, stories and fables. It’s unlike any other book on this topic I’ve read and one that probably deserves several re-reads to take everything in.
How to Talk so Little Kids Will Listen by Joanna Faber and Julie King
Aimed at parents of children aged 2-7, How to Talk So Little Kids Will Listen is all about communication. It takes common parenting challenges that can easily become power battles and offers advice for effective (and peaceful) ways to deal with them. I really like the scripts this book offers and the ways you can tailor them to reflect your personal style and values.
The Brave Learner by Julie Bogart
This book is technically about home education, so I wasn’t sure whether to include it. But I love it, so I will 🙂 If you’re home educating, considering it, or just want a few ideas for how to create a rich home environment for your kids, this book is great. I really like Julie’s philosophy of enchantment and the mix of practical advice and encouragement.
Parenting from the Inside Out by Daniel J. Siegel and Mary Hartzell
One of the hardest parts of parenting is that our kids’ behaviour holds a magnifying glass over all our… stuff. That’s what Parenting from the Inside Out is about: addressing the things that parenting small people dredges up in us so we can stop repeating generational cycles and (hopefully) build secure attachments with our kids.
Daily Greatness Parents’ Journal
Full disclosure: I got this journal a few years ago and, like a lot of things, it has increased in price since then. I’m still including it on this list because it ticks multiple boxes and I really like it. It’s a blend of quotes, worksheets, daily pages, planners, weekly check-ins, and an annual reflection, and the focus of this journal is on becoming more conscious and intentional in your parenting.
You can get 10% off any Daily Greatness journal with this link.
The Year of You for Mothers by Hannah Braime
Yep, I’m going to be cheeky and include my own book on this list! This is a daily guided journal that will help you reflect on your parenting experience and maintain (or regain) that important connection with the areas of your life that can get pushed aside by the daily whirlwind of parenting. Inside, you’ll find 365 daily journaling prompts that will make you think about a specific aspect of your life and your parenting experience, including identity, purpose and meaning, community, money, health, and more.
Have you read a great book for parents? Leave a comment and share your recommendations!
Photo by Heike Mintel on Unsplash