Journaling is a useful tool for personal growth, but there might be times when our practice can also start to feel a little stale or stuck. I’ve shared lots of different prompts here on the blog before (and I have three books of prompts, for mothers, creatives, and everyone!) Sometimes, however, it’s not about introducing new ideas, but taking a step back and looking at the bigger picture of how you’re approaching journaling and integrating it within your life. In his book Opening Up by Writing it Down, psychologist and researcher James Pennebaker shares three useful questions we can use to take our journaling deeper:
1. Are you using writing as a substitute for action?
Most of the things we journal about can be divided into things we can control (or influence) and things we can’t. We can’t control the weather but we can choose to dress appropriately. Writing about certain situations can be useful for events beyond our control (for example, grieving the loss of a loved one), but when it comes to things we can control, sometimes the most helpful thing is to take action and make a change. Journaling can help us identify what this action or change might be, but writing about them can also lull us into a sense of feeling like we’re doing the work when we’re not. A question I like to ask myself (that comes from Lynda Monk of the IAJW) is “Based on what I’ve written about today, what is one action I want to take or one thing I want to do differently going forward?”
2. Is it an intellectual rather than a reflective exercise?
Does your journaling read more like an academic essay than a personal account? Is it full of the ideas of other people rather than reflections about yourself? If so, you might find that getting more personal helps you take your journaling deeper. If you notice you’re writing a lot about what happened over how you felt, what other people did over what you did and your reflections about that, or similar, try to refocus on your thoughts, feelings, behaviours, and role in the situations. On a similar note…
3. Are you using your writing for uncensored complaining?
Writing ideally helps us organise, structure, and make meaning out of the events of our lives. When someone does or says something that hurts our feelings or angers us, our writing can become about them, what they’ve done, and how they treat us. Unfortunately, venting doesn’t work as well as we think it does; studies have shown it might actually make us feel worse. Instead, it’s helpful to ask things like: why has this hurt me so badly? Why do I think these feelings are so intense right now? As you notice if your writing is focusing on what other people did more than how you are feeling and any self-reflection, you can also ask: Why am I writing this way? How do I feel about what I’m writing? Why does this person bother me in the way they do?
I hope you found those questions as helpful as I did! If you’d like more journaling-related suggestions I invite you to check out my book The Ultimate Guide to Journaling, as well as The Year of You series of guided journals.
